Ref: https://twitter.com/pain_net1/status/116…4154445826 & https://www.infrastructure.gov.au/depart…etary.aspx & https://auntypru.com/round-and-round-the…r-and-etc/ & https://auntypru.com/sbg-10-11-19-no-dea…uch-safer/ & AOPA Oz step into the BRM Aero v CASA brouhaha
The great sock pulling up competition. (A whimsical twiddle). – AP Forum version.
It is boys and girls a very real event; lots of entrants, many socks down below ankles, much effort required to restore to intended standard. As always, these events are surrounded by much Hoop-La and gamesmanship; some of it so bizarre as to be hilarious; other efforts vary between the Cor Blimey and the ridiculous. The real art is not in pulling up ones socks, why even children can do. No, its the fine art of getting ’em on straight and getting ’em to stay up and in that position after once around the perimeter track on a push bike. Seems simple enough don’t it – but it ain’t. Much depends on why the socks are down below boot tops – and what sort of boots you wear. Garters are permitted, but avoided by the experts as they reduce circulation and make peddling the bike ‘difficult’.
No matter, the technicalities are for the entrants to come to terms with; let us take a look at the field. In rough alphabetical order:-
AOPA; long white socks, shorts, terry towel hats and sunglasses; the prominently displayed ‘badges’ and ‘aviator stuff’ adding weight. There’s enough hot air available to pull their socks up – provided it can be controlled. Recent form suggests an excess of this stuff swelling heads and preventing clear vision of where the tops are and where they should be located when found. The entry starts at long odds to finish as the sheer volume of superfluous verbiage required to begin the task in earnest prevents efficient completion of task – on schedule.
ATSB; being loosely affiliated with the dramatic arts, the choice of ‘costume de jour’ will slow down the start; then, the endless discussion about ‘which’ socks are the right socks – given the rest of the ensemble, will definitely preclude a speedy resolution to task. Statistics must influence their choice; then, almost like Morris dancers, the colours and bells, and withes must all be coordinated to match the story line portrayed. It is actually difficult to set odds for this motley crew; there’s no guarantee, on previous track record, that they can actually get an entrant to the starting line – let alone finish, sometime between now and next Pancake Tuesday.
ASA; bereft of their courage badges have a monumental task to finish. Bloated feet and swollen ankles encased in very expensive, hand made electric blue Lycra are the very devil to pull up, even harder to keep up during any sort of meaningful activity.
They will try an expensive ‘hi-tech’ solution but considering the time and effort and outrageous cost of the equipment; without the problems of actually getting those socks onto those bloated feet made the short odds to even start – let alone finish.
CASA; Oh dear; an unlikely starter. They may yet have a tilt at the title, they do have some small amount of skin in the game – but how; there’s the question. One pair of socks, one set of feet – them’s the rules. Now when you consider that at least a dozen other pairs of feet must attend even a breaking of wind ceremony, and each is allowed to participate and then, that all must go before the grand Pooh-Bar of wind breaking for sanction; you see that by the time a bullet proof pair of socks can used, and suitable excuses for those socks being entered – it’s all a little too complex for the simple rules of the race.
DoiT – have a real problem getting to the start line – they were not invited: and, even if an invitation was offered, by the time they’ve decided which socks, who’s to wear ’em, race strategy and how to get the bloody things on – the right feet – its far too little, far too late – for the race is well and truly over.
Ministerial entry – Ha ha; Ho Ho ho. Hee hee hee – titter, sniggers and guffaws follow the mere suggestion. The very idea of a minister pulling his socks up, in public – let alone entering a race is risible; in the extreme.
RAOz – Sure to start, provided a pathway has been prepared for them and the wind is blowing in the right direction and the rules can be amended to suit their own game plan. To win the trophy – all stops will be pulled out, for there is great kudos in a win, any win. Even if the industry disappears ? However as elbow mounted clubs are not permitted and they will be judged on merit and performance; their lead weighted socks and ‘external’ (off camera) assistance will not assist.
Silly old twiddle ain’t it – but I say this. If lots of socks ain’t pulled up, quick, smart and tidy; considering the way things stand – we’ll all be looking for a pair of socks without holes. Gentlemen – we were deep, deep in the morass before this bloody virus; without a collective effort and a serious, honest attempt to make things happen for aviation – we’re well and truly snookered. All know the problem – we know where it lays – time to stop pissing about and sort out the mess – before the mess wins the hand. Honestly, I’d love to bang some silly heads together – I really would…Alas..
Selah – Oh, and happy sock racing.