Well. - Slap my ass and call me Sally.
Or: a soliloquy on Pony-Pooh? - Ayup, 'tis a ramble.
It seems, much to my chagrin; that the wheel has turned full circle and I must – perforce – do my duty to my BRB brothers in arms (alms – I you like it better). ‘Tis time to talk of the Beechcraft 200 and those as fly it. All in relation to Australia’s narrowly avoided multi person BBQ at the Essendon DFO.
In primus, we must begin with the aircraft. I have, much to my delight and benefit, spent some 2000 happy hours in the peerless King Air. I can, with some ease; and, in a heartbeat, provide somewhere in the region of 100, 000 hours (total) of pilots experienced– on type, to support my words. The aircraft is, without doubt, one of the most outstanding aircraft, in it’s class, ever produced.
What, you may ask has this to do with the murky, mindless, money grubbing behaviour of those who wrote Essendon aerodrome off as a Dodo and the near serious tragedy when a superb aircraft collided with a building which had no right; neither a legal, moral, nor financially supportable to reason to be there. Aunt Pru and the associates: both, have commanded this missive. Thus I proceed.
"So weary with disasters, tugg'd with fortune,
That I would set my life on any chance,
To mend, or be rid on't."
As stated, the aircraft is, of itself, a stand alone ‘super-star’. There is not a Royal Flying Doctor Service (RFDS) pilot in Australia who would gainsay that statement. Scenario: it is two AM when a call is received. A ‘Header’ has tipped over, the driver has been stabilised – but, critical – needs blood and must be moved “now – now”. Life and death in the balance. RFDS responds (now-now). A full blown medical emergency. The locals have used ‘utility’ vehicles to light the landing area; there are some Kerosene soaked toilet rolls to be used as a flare path. It is a pitch black – no ambient lighting – paddock in the middle of somewhere-nowhere – in the middle of the night. Tricky stuff. Black hole approach (no aids) to a paddock – middle of nowhere, middle of the night. What is the aircraft of ‘choice’? Ask the RFDS pilots. Gods alone know how many hours the RFDS have flown in the B200, in similar circumstances. Crap weather or good. They have, almost always - got the job done; safely. No one died that night. Now ask yourself a simple question. Which aircraft (your choice) would you prefer strapped to your sorry ass that night. Shout it out loud. The Be 20. Why? Well I shall explain. The aircraft is ‘agile’, powerful, robust and, totally reliable – it is also quite forgiving. Totally, completely, absolutely - in the right (trained) hands – a pilot’s aircraft. On a dark, cold, lonely night, to a paddock, in the middle of nowhere – the pilot’s choice, the venerable, much loved Beechcraft 200 – bar non.
A quick ‘ring-around’ of experienced Be20 pilots that I personally know (<40,000 hrs on type -collectively) agree. It is an almost automatic action, during pre start up checks to ‘ensure’ that ALL trims ae set neutral. Questioned; many admitted that they had ‘ONCE” and one time only taken off without checking that ‘all’ trims were ‘neutral’ as per the book. Only once though. QED. Did it myself – once – after a very fast turnaround, during which maintenance was conducted. It was the rudder trim- the ‘ginger beer’ had checked something – I, in a rush failed to reset. I felt and noted this at about 40 knots during the take off. Corrected my stupidity by 45 knots, spent a hour lecturing myself on how I should have known better and swore to never, ever do it again. (I was young and immortal at the time).
I ramble on about this because I find it passing strange that a professional pilot, unhurried, with a good weather forecast, a light load, a short hop at a sensible hour of day would fail to make the routine, almost second nature checks. Given the fact that the pilot in question had just undertaken some ‘additional’ training’ and was very, very conscious of the ‘scrutiny’ of fellow pilots and probably the CASA. More likely to err on the side of caution than to throw caution, required checks and the deep seated habits we all acquire, to the wind. Then consider the aircraft check-lists. Walk through the ‘acceptance’, pre start, taxi, pre take off lists. They are comprehensive, logical and take the pilot around the cockpit several times. Bear in mind that SOP is re-set all trims as part of the 'after landing check list (lest we forget). One may ‘miss’ , once, a five degree offset from ‘centre’ of a trim indicator, but full rudder trim? Not even on the balance of probability scale is it. Even if you did, the rudder becomes effective at about 40 knots (ish). That rudder is connected to the pilot’s feet on take off – very, very firmly connected. Has to be for any sort of take off. So, the very inexperienced, shamatuer pilot, the Hi-Viz Hood, who is not a professional pilot’s bootstrap, wants us to believe that a deemed competent, qualified, type experienced fellah, fresh out of re-training simply ignored every warning that all was not well and ploughed into a building?
BOLLOCKS.
For a start, with two healthy engines and an old lady flying the aircraft, it would have been, with a simple rudder out of trim condition, easily ‘flyable’ for the short period it would take to correct the error. It would climb like a homesick angel, despite the ‘sideslip’ mumbo-jumbo Hood dragged out of his sorry arse. This incident began on the runway – the take off path clearly defines this; the rest is history. We need to know what, exactly was going on in that cockpit. Something had gone awry – but what and why?
"That but this blow
Might be the be-all and the end-all here,
But here, upon this bank and shoal of time,
We'ld jump the life to come."
What is immediately apparent is the indecent haste, without a coroners report or detailed forensic airframe and engine examination complete, to blame the dead pilot? The incredible arrogance of an unqualified ‘clerk’ in declaring that there were five separate opportunities to correct the error Hood declares was made is simply breath taking. We need to look deeper.
BRB – big shout (unanimous) “String him up by his balls”.
P7 – (sotto voce) “No, he’d probably like that………………” Instant silence.
ATSB has now gained a world wide reputation of being an ‘arse covering’ glove puppet, a catamite to those who hold sway. Look back to Lockhart River, look back to the Pel-Air debacle, take a close look at MH 370. Then take a very close look at the Hood credentials to run the ATSB. When you’ve done with that, take a very close look at NASAG and the DoIT involvement in the selling off of aerodromes. I say there is more chance of an ‘error’ to be found there, than in Quartermain’s pre take off preparations.
So why this repeat performance of the Pel-Air (blame the pilot) debacle? Blame the pilot, denigrate him, his family memory of him, tarnish his good name – without a shred of evidence. All on the say so of Greg Hood. Bullshit. Why the huge smoke screen? Nothing to do with property developers and slightly dodgy deals done with the big end developers is it? Nah of course not. “That building saved lives” dontcha know……………..Course it did Greg, sure. The DFO is our hero de jour. Bollocks.
That DFO needs to be torn down. The Californian code must be adopted. And the damn fool minister needs to learn the difference between a Runway End Zone and a Safety Zone. For his information – there is a concrete monstrosity parked right in a ‘safety zone’; it’s pretty big, has killed five people and has the potential to kill many more; shoppers, workers and the like. It nearly did, except for the grace of lady luck, kill a damn site more than five.
Aye, they say money talks – which ain’t true. It whispers quietly in the ears of those who prize it above their honour, above their honesty, above the law and in defiance of the gods themselves. Are they ashamed – hell no, they’re off boozing it up on yacht with Mojito’s and dancing girls; probably payed for by the hapless, long suffering dupe - the Australian tax payer.
Toot – too ducking ridiculous - toot.