Follows on from post 462 – HERE -. More haste?
Addendum - The three 'Howlers'
If (big one) – if it wasn't so ducking serious, expensive and pointless, in the right hands the following 'expressions' could be made into a comedy sketch along the lines of 'Yes Minister' – not quite as witty or elegant; but in the Pub? Suffice to say that at the BRB indaba (pre Christmas bash) last evening, the phrases were the subject of much hilarity. What else can you do? – For you dare not contemplate the fact that those espousing such phrases are all earning big dollars and 'running' the safety of the travelling public (if you could call it that with any semblance of veracity and a straight face).
Up first; our very own Wee Bearded Popinjay, top gun at the ATSB, who has ruled out any form of investigation into a mid-air collision which claimed two lives. - HERE-.
Mr Mitchell said "mid-air collisions were rare and any ATSB investigation would be "unlikely to yield new safety learnings for the aviation industry".
Well, this is only the second 'mid-air' within recent times; six lives and four aircraft lost; so why on earth would the ATSB decide to investigate. Seriously what's the point? Popinjay knows it all and decided that he has all the 'learnings' he needs already and they match both his 'earnings' and ego. Small man + big words out of phase = Pony Pooh. Perhaps a small lesson in Grammar would assist – HERE -.
“Despite being more popular than “lessons” in the corporate setting, “learnings” is still incorrect. It’s an erroneous plural form of the colloquial term “learning.”
Now for my own personal favourite:-
"I am advised that." etc.
- HERE - What a lovely little 'get out of gaol card' that is. “I was advised that the aircraft had been fuelled”. “I was advised that the power had been turned off” etc etc. You see the point; the easy escape from responsibility. Mind you, the dozy politician should have jumped on that - “by whom and can you provide the written evidence we must rely on should this ferry be found out of control on Sydney harbour again? “Oh, but I was only advised that the repairs were done and up to standard.” Horse feathers...
“Your safety is in your hands”.
Last, but not least – HERE - from the CASA receptionist – sorry should say DAS; the stunning epiphany which will re shape the thinking of every pilot on the planet. The staggering intellectual connotations of that one phrase will be hailed by the global aviation fraternity. The blinding flash of inspiration for this gem was a mid air collision which claimed four lives, but thought unlikely to change anything that mattered until the Ex Spence revelation of the up until now unknown cure all for all aviation events which claim lives. I wonder was she 'advised' that this was 'the answer to the pagans prayer' or was it writ on the bottle of hand sanitiser in the Loo? "I am advised that there will be no further learnings from my tenure after my earth shattering epiphany; so I shall leave you now with my best wishes - All the best etc/ Arrrggghh - Hell's bells, where's that bloody bucket FCOL........
These folks have probably earned between 'em in excess of 2.5 million – value for money? Safety improved? Probity, accountability and money well spent? Silly question really – ain't it?
Toot – toot...!
Addendum - The three 'Howlers'
If (big one) – if it wasn't so ducking serious, expensive and pointless, in the right hands the following 'expressions' could be made into a comedy sketch along the lines of 'Yes Minister' – not quite as witty or elegant; but in the Pub? Suffice to say that at the BRB indaba (pre Christmas bash) last evening, the phrases were the subject of much hilarity. What else can you do? – For you dare not contemplate the fact that those espousing such phrases are all earning big dollars and 'running' the safety of the travelling public (if you could call it that with any semblance of veracity and a straight face).
Up first; our very own Wee Bearded Popinjay, top gun at the ATSB, who has ruled out any form of investigation into a mid-air collision which claimed two lives. - HERE-.
Mr Mitchell said "mid-air collisions were rare and any ATSB investigation would be "unlikely to yield new safety learnings for the aviation industry".
Well, this is only the second 'mid-air' within recent times; six lives and four aircraft lost; so why on earth would the ATSB decide to investigate. Seriously what's the point? Popinjay knows it all and decided that he has all the 'learnings' he needs already and they match both his 'earnings' and ego. Small man + big words out of phase = Pony Pooh. Perhaps a small lesson in Grammar would assist – HERE -.
“Despite being more popular than “lessons” in the corporate setting, “learnings” is still incorrect. It’s an erroneous plural form of the colloquial term “learning.”
Now for my own personal favourite:-
"I am advised that." etc.
- HERE - What a lovely little 'get out of gaol card' that is. “I was advised that the aircraft had been fuelled”. “I was advised that the power had been turned off” etc etc. You see the point; the easy escape from responsibility. Mind you, the dozy politician should have jumped on that - “by whom and can you provide the written evidence we must rely on should this ferry be found out of control on Sydney harbour again? “Oh, but I was only advised that the repairs were done and up to standard.” Horse feathers...
“Your safety is in your hands”.
Last, but not least – HERE - from the CASA receptionist – sorry should say DAS; the stunning epiphany which will re shape the thinking of every pilot on the planet. The staggering intellectual connotations of that one phrase will be hailed by the global aviation fraternity. The blinding flash of inspiration for this gem was a mid air collision which claimed four lives, but thought unlikely to change anything that mattered until the Ex Spence revelation of the up until now unknown cure all for all aviation events which claim lives. I wonder was she 'advised' that this was 'the answer to the pagans prayer' or was it writ on the bottle of hand sanitiser in the Loo? "I am advised that there will be no further learnings from my tenure after my earth shattering epiphany; so I shall leave you now with my best wishes - All the best etc/ Arrrggghh - Hell's bells, where's that bloody bucket FCOL........
These folks have probably earned between 'em in excess of 2.5 million – value for money? Safety improved? Probity, accountability and money well spent? Silly question really – ain't it?
Toot – toot...!