Bollocks; and, FDS, FCOL etc.
“Good morning ladies, gentlemen and those sitting on a bucket without a cushion; Capt. Joe McCool here, my co-pilot today is Rajah457 and your fabulous cabin crew Ditzy, Mitzy and PMT are with us today for your exciting journey from Big Smoke to Kickinatinalong”. The journey, for the most part will be a boring and uncomfortable as ever; however, as part of the fun, we have prepared, ‘free of charge’ a list of some of the exciting new developments on the aerodrome, approved by your government”. “Yes folks, all of the flight deck take off adrenalin will be heard through the cabin speakers; or through your own ear phones, provided they have not exploded”. “Safety is our primary concern; however, we only have three buckets of water on board, so if your earphones start to feel a little warm, please take them off and advise Ditzy as she is the only person qualified to dunk ‘em, the fee for this service is $17.50 GST included”.
“So, sit back relax and enjoy the live video feed and cockpit commentary as we clear the tall buildings in a single bound”.
Transcript (ATSB edited and publi-shit):-
00.001 “Blue Sky 101 – Clear for take –off”.
BS101 – “Roddggerr that – BS 101 is rolling”.
JMcC - “Folks, as we reach lour safety speed of 80 knots, 160 Kph; you can see that the latest Formula 1 motel site crane is now a 140 feet above us, off to the left about 500 meters, in the event of an unforeseen emergency, be assured we will miss it by the legally reaquired 35 feet”.
JMcC - “Now folks as we approach our decision speed; we call it V1, you can see out to the right about 100 meters the latest and greatest DFO expected to be just under two hundred feet high when completed, what a shopping experience: “WTF” (beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep).
Raj457 – “Oh I believe the number two has quit Sir”.
JMcC – “Well FFS keep the bloody aircraft straight – taking over – “{Oh Crap}” sotto voce almost a whispered prayer. End of recording………………………………….
P2 “ – PS. Perhaps a few more of the Alphabets should be throwing their support behind the AIPA submission - just a thought...
It is hard to believe that the light end of industry is sitting on it’s arse; letting this ‘close in’ development happen. The Archerfield crowd have a mile of research, law and common sense safety to argue with, not mind you that it did them a lot of good. CASA only ‘interested’ in ‘splay’ compliance. For a very expensive ‘safety regulator’, they sure are selective in which parts of ‘safety’ they get interested in. Wrong date in a log book or a torque gauge out of date by an hour; lookout, the ‘safety agency’ is all over you. Criminal record following.
P2 – “Well no surprises there, pretty much matches the spin and bulldust bureaucratese we had heard from Comardy and Tiede some 2 weeks before at Senate estimates - i.e. no care and definitely no responsibility...”
WTD#1:-
There is a possibility that the increase in the dollar trigger may permit larger buildings to be constructed under that trigger which may inadvertently have an effect on aviation safety.
WTD#2:-
This risk would be remediated by continued monitoring by the Department of Infrastructure and Regional Development as the relevant agency and advice to all federal leased airport managers that any construction (even if below the current or proposed dollar trigger) should be discussed with CASA for possible safety implications prior to proceeding...
Round and round she goes; who's back garden it lands in, no one knows. But you can buy a ticket in the lottery, or buy a property. If the toxins don’t getcha, a King Air will.
Civil - Aviation - Safety – Authority, that is the name, right? So howzabout it? Or is the DoIT really running the ‘development’ scam.
Appoint the tea lady. (roared the crowd).
Toot – toot (Oh, and stay off the top floor of your convenient air-side motel – thrill seeker).
“Good morning ladies, gentlemen and those sitting on a bucket without a cushion; Capt. Joe McCool here, my co-pilot today is Rajah457 and your fabulous cabin crew Ditzy, Mitzy and PMT are with us today for your exciting journey from Big Smoke to Kickinatinalong”. The journey, for the most part will be a boring and uncomfortable as ever; however, as part of the fun, we have prepared, ‘free of charge’ a list of some of the exciting new developments on the aerodrome, approved by your government”. “Yes folks, all of the flight deck take off adrenalin will be heard through the cabin speakers; or through your own ear phones, provided they have not exploded”. “Safety is our primary concern; however, we only have three buckets of water on board, so if your earphones start to feel a little warm, please take them off and advise Ditzy as she is the only person qualified to dunk ‘em, the fee for this service is $17.50 GST included”.
“So, sit back relax and enjoy the live video feed and cockpit commentary as we clear the tall buildings in a single bound”.
Transcript (ATSB edited and publi-shit):-
00.001 “Blue Sky 101 – Clear for take –off”.
BS101 – “Roddggerr that – BS 101 is rolling”.
JMcC - “Folks, as we reach lour safety speed of 80 knots, 160 Kph; you can see that the latest Formula 1 motel site crane is now a 140 feet above us, off to the left about 500 meters, in the event of an unforeseen emergency, be assured we will miss it by the legally reaquired 35 feet”.
JMcC - “Now folks as we approach our decision speed; we call it V1, you can see out to the right about 100 meters the latest and greatest DFO expected to be just under two hundred feet high when completed, what a shopping experience: “WTF” (beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep).
Raj457 – “Oh I believe the number two has quit Sir”.
JMcC – “Well FFS keep the bloody aircraft straight – taking over – “{Oh Crap}” sotto voce almost a whispered prayer. End of recording………………………………….
P2 “ – PS. Perhaps a few more of the Alphabets should be throwing their support behind the AIPA submission - just a thought...
It is hard to believe that the light end of industry is sitting on it’s arse; letting this ‘close in’ development happen. The Archerfield crowd have a mile of research, law and common sense safety to argue with, not mind you that it did them a lot of good. CASA only ‘interested’ in ‘splay’ compliance. For a very expensive ‘safety regulator’, they sure are selective in which parts of ‘safety’ they get interested in. Wrong date in a log book or a torque gauge out of date by an hour; lookout, the ‘safety agency’ is all over you. Criminal record following.
P2 – “Well no surprises there, pretty much matches the spin and bulldust bureaucratese we had heard from Comardy and Tiede some 2 weeks before at Senate estimates - i.e. no care and definitely no responsibility...”
WTD#1:-
There is a possibility that the increase in the dollar trigger may permit larger buildings to be constructed under that trigger which may inadvertently have an effect on aviation safety.
WTD#2:-
This risk would be remediated by continued monitoring by the Department of Infrastructure and Regional Development as the relevant agency and advice to all federal leased airport managers that any construction (even if below the current or proposed dollar trigger) should be discussed with CASA for possible safety implications prior to proceeding...
Round and round she goes; who's back garden it lands in, no one knows. But you can buy a ticket in the lottery, or buy a property. If the toxins don’t getcha, a King Air will.
Civil - Aviation - Safety – Authority, that is the name, right? So howzabout it? Or is the DoIT really running the ‘development’ scam.
Appoint the tea lady. (roared the crowd).
Toot – toot (Oh, and stay off the top floor of your convenient air-side motel – thrill seeker).